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Somethings you have to go one step back in order to go two steps forward.


1-forward-2-backThings are going along nicely for a change. You’ve had a revelation. You’ve reached an epiphany and suddenly things are flow and life is good. It can only get better from here on in.

Then suddenly, without warning, you find yourself back at square one. Things feel just as bad, if not worse, and you fall into despair because you were doing so well… and now you’re not.

That anger that you felt you had gotten past before and has allowed you to move on is back in full force and you even feel angrier than before.

Or it might be some trauma, or fear, or resentment, or lack of self-confidence.

Sound familiar?

What happened?

This is a very common scenario, especially for those on the spiritual path. For them it’s 2 steps forward and 1 step back. It’s very frustrating and most don’t really understand what is going on.

So let’s look at what is really happening.

There will indeed be times when we feel like we’re making headway. We are moving forward so fast and feeling so amazing that we feeling that nothing can stop us.

Then we hit that wall. Ouch! Why?

If we’ve faced and conquered our demons, so to speak, then why are they back?

The truth is, you haven’t conquered them fully. You’ve just dealt with one aspect of them. It’s allowed you to reach a new understanding, but there is still more work to do. You may revisit the same thing over and over, each time chipping away at another piece of it until finally you have removed the entire block, and are really ready to move onto new things.

This is normal. It’s not always possible to deal with something in its entirety, especially if it’s deep, long term and part of your belief system.

You have to take it in stages. You have to look at it from different angles, and each stage can feel almost the same, but there are subtle differences.

Or if it is the same, then you’ve not retained what you learned, and you need to have a refresher in what you needed to know.

Life is a process. We can move forwards and backward at the same time, and sometimes you need to move backwards in order go forward.

Remember, if something isn’t there within you to begin with, you wouldn’t be facing it. So you need to deal with it according to your abilities so you can heal it.

Healing can take a long time. There is no time limit to how long it may take. Some feel embarrassed about having the same issues come up over and over again. They may feel like a broken record, but that’s just how it goes. Eventually, if you keep at it, you will heal and get past those things that hold you back.

The problem is that most people get discouraged and give up. They forget how much progress they actually made.

This is the worst thing you can do, though. Giving up will never get you to where you desire to be.

Yes, it can be painful, and yes, you may feel like you’ll never get there, but this I promise you. Keep at it, and you will succeed. Things will shift around for you to make it happen.

Life is a process of creation. You are the creator. Trust in the flow and know that you can’t help but get there in the end, no matter how bad things seem right now.

Do not fear the darkness… thank it instead.


light and darkThere’s a parable by Neale Donald Walsch called The Little Soul and the Sun. There are two parts to this tale. In a nutshell, the story is about a soul who wanted to know who he was., but because all there was, was light, and all he was, was light, he could not do this.
It begins:

There once was a soul who knew itself to be the light. This was a new soul, and so, anxious for experience. “I am the light,” it said. “I am the light.” Yet all the knowing of it and all the saying of it could not substitute for the experience of it. And in the realm from which this soul emerged, there was nothing but the light. Every soul was grand, every soul was magnificent, and every soul shone with the brilliance of God’s awesome light. And so the little soul in question was as a candle in the sun. In the midst of the grandest light — of which it was a part — it could not see itself, nor experience itself as Who and What it Really Is.

And then goes on to explain that in order for the soul to know itself, it must separate itself from all that is and call upon the darkness so it may know its own light and experience who he or she really is.

But in order for that soul aspect to know itself as light, someone had to play the part of being the darkness.

In this story, the soul wished to experience forgiveness, but as there was no one to forgive; someone had to play that part.

Another soul offered: “I will come into your next physical lifetime and do something for you to forgive. I ask only one thing in return,”

“Anything! Anything!” the Little Soul cried.

“In the moment that I strike you and smite you, in the moment that I do the worst to you that you could ever imagine – in that self-same moment…remember Who I Really Am.”

“Oh, I won’t forget!” promised the Little Soul. “I will see you in the perfection with which I hold you now, and I will remember Who You Are, always.”

This story illustrates perfectly why we have darkness. Why there are demons, and why people attack and hurt us.

And while many people do indeed seem to understand that all we do is because we have created it on some level, and that is our free will in action, they seem to forget the very thing they need to remember.

The ones who are dark are dark because without them, we could not experience our own light.

Far too often, I see people condemning demons, so called evil, people who have wronged them and cursing them to Hell (or whatever place they feel is punishing enough. )

Far too often people insist that there is no help for those being and they are not worthy or their time, their healing, or even their love or blessings.

But is this really what we should be doing? So called negative beings don’t remember who they really are. Perhaps they have chosen a part where, by necessity, they cannot have any connection to the light. No matter what is done, they will always be of the dark because that is what is required. And they will remain so until they eventually return, with the rest, to source.

People seem to take great pride in condemning that which they consider to be dark. They simply love to hate and detest anything that doesn’t meet their own personal standards.

But condemning the dark is as useless as condemning the night. Everything is there for a reason. It wouldn’t exist otherwise.

I can’t help but wonder how horrible it would be to be hated by everyone, attacked and detested just for being.

Personally, I feel we should bless the darkness. Thank them for their gift and even their sacrifice. Those who have even experienced a little of what it’s like to not have light in your life should understand what it is like to be like them.

They may not remember who they are. They may never be able to in this realm, but that doesn’t mean we should forget, either.

And while you may not agree or condone their actions, always come from a place of love, rather than hate or fear.

Someone has to play the bad guy. Perhaps one day it may be you.

Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? Part 4 of 4


photoI get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

In part one we discussed  Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

In part two we discussed Research and Self-awareness.

In part three we discussed practicing your abilities.

Now we’ll look at the final two: Grounding and creating.

 

Step six : Grounding.

When you are ungrounded, it’s very hard to get a handle on your abilities. The key to grounding is self-confidence. When you doubt yourself, you will rarely be secure or grounded. This can occur when you doubt your feelings, feel that you don’t belong somewhere or take someone else’s point of view over yours.

Self-doubt is the nemesis of the Empath. They cannot afford to allow it if they wish to live a happy life and use their abilities to help others and their own path.

Whatever you do, do it with conviction. Whatever you do, make sure it matches your feelings. If it feels wrong, don’t do it.

And whatever you do, don’t get stuck in a mindset that you feel you have the answers. Nothing is absolute as everything is always changing. Always be open to new ways and new perceptions. If you become stuck, you can not only stall your growth, but lead an increasingly miserable existence.

Always allow change, but always make sure that change is in line with who you are. All change it good, even though it may seem tragic or horrible at the time. Remember, we often can’t see the forest for the trees.

And the final and seventh step isCreating.

And by that, I mean take back your creating power and letting it work for you, rather than letting others create your reality for you. We are all creators, in spite of what others may believe. We have the power and abilities to create a reality that is amazing and wonderful.

We are always creating with every thought and action. We do not realize it, though. Then when things turn out horribly, we do not understand that it was ourselves that created it. 

We do this in so many unwitting ways. We believe we are not good enough. That we do not deserve to be happy. That we are not worthy of riches, fame and success. That we are not capable of doing the things others can do.

But truth is: We are. We have exactly what we need in order to achieve what we came here for. It may not seem that way, but free dictates that you must have it, otherwise it would not be free will.

So remember, every thought, action and state of being is creative. Watch everything you think and say. Even simple words such as: ‘I’m sick and tired of this’ will eventually create a reality where you really are sick and tired. And you will not see it as something you created. You’ll simply see it as validation for what you’ve been saying all along.

Choose to take back your creative power. Choose to take reasonability for your life and circumstances. You are not there by chance. Nothing is random (unless you believe that it is, in which case you are choosing a random existence.)

Choose to be an amazing Empath that can life a joyful and prosperous life with full control over their abilities.

As always, choose wisely. 

Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? Part 3 of 4


third eyeI get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

In part one we discussed  Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

In part two we discussed Research and Self-awareness.

Today we’ll look at Practicing your abilities, which is step five.

Practicing your abilities.

The more you use something, the more proficient and comfortable you will become at using it. Don’t be afraid of failures or when things did not pan out like you expected them to. Those are valuable experiences in what works and what doesn’t work. It’s not unusual to sometimes get a false positive.

A false positive?

Something that feels right, but isn’t. Now I know that sounds contradictory as to me saying, trust your feelings, but it’s worth noting this:

Sometimes when you feel something is true, but you find that it isn’t, look deeper. There will be truth, but it may well appear in a certain context.

For instance, if you sense something happening for someone but you are told this has not happened, it may well be because you are sensing something that may happen, has happened or is happening, but the subject does not acknowledge it. Also, such things can be a matter of perspective and terminology.

You know, that is a cop out. Psychics use that excuse all the time when they get something wrong.

We’re not talking about charlatans. We’re not talking about people who do cold readings. We’ve already established that the person is an Empath. They are picking up feelings and possibly much, much more. They are not out to scam anyone.

We are discussing how they should develop their abilities and what happens if something feels right but isn’t. So do not confuse the two.

Okay, difference is noted.

A false positive is when something is right, but you do not have the right context to put it into. Do not dismiss it, simply put it aside and see what else comes up. It is completely possible to tell someone something they are in denial of, and so they will not acknowledge something in spite of it being true.

All it means is that it’s not what needs to be heard right now. It may not be true for that person right at the point of time, but there will be truth in retrospect. Hence, you have a positive, but it’s not the time to discuss it. Trust in your feelings on that one. You will often feel you shouldn’t tell someone something. Listen to that.

If it’s true, then it’s not a false positive. It’s not false at all.

It means that it feels right, but circumstances make it not right. It still is true, but is not acknowledged as such. You are thinking of it appearing true, in spite of the fact that it is not true. While that is also termed as a false positive, it is another definition of the term. 

Next Part four: Grounding and Creating

Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? – Part 2 of 4


reaaerchI get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

There are seven steps

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

We previously discussed Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

Today we’ll at Research and Self-awareness.

 

Step three is: Research.

When you discover you are an empath, try to learn as much as about the subject as is possible. This is actually not too hard nowadays as there is truly an abundance of information out there on the internet. There isn’t even any need to pay for such information as it’s freely available.

I have seen Empath toolkits for sale. I don’t know much about them but I assume they would be helpful?

Toolkits tend to repackage what is already freely available and sell as new information. However, if you decide to pay for one, it may not provide the answers you seek because you do not really know what you are getting.

There are really many Empaths out there, and connecting to others through forums or support groups is a good start. Sharing experiences, ideas and personal thought with others who are of the same mind set can be very helpful.

Just remember, there are many informative sites out there that offer that type of information for free.

The Empath Guidebook is just one such book and many other giving souls have written some amazing work for the beginning Empath.

Step four is: Self-awareness.

Once you know and understand you are an Empath, it’s time to start observing yourself being an Empath, and looking at where your feelings begin and end. As amazing as it may seem, people, in general, really do not know themselves all that well. They might think that they do, but you’d be surprised at just how many refuse to really look at who they are being and how they react to things. Often the ego will not allow them to do so, fearing that they may not see themselves as a good or spiritual person or like what they see.

But knowing oneself does not mean you have to accept what you find. It’s not until you accept where you are at right now that you can begin to change what you wish to become.

Know yourself. Trust in what you feel. Feel what you know and you will begin to understand who you really are. Define your boundaries. Declare to the world: ‘This is who I am’ and take pride in it.

Who you are is personal. No one can tell you to be something you are not, or who you don’t wish to be. Whatever you choose to be, let every action reflect that, and in the course of time, you will become that person.

Be aware. Always look at your thoughts and actions and decide if that is who you wish to be. 

Next: Part three: Practicing your abilities. 

Empath Series: First steps – I’ve just discovered I’m an Empath. Now what? – part 1 of 4


Image-1I get a lot of questions from people who say: I’ve just found out I’m an Empath. What do I do?

There are an abundance of resources and support groups for the Empath, but I thought we’d look at what would be helpful for any Empath to know when they discover they are one.

Personally, I had no clue how to write this, so as usual, when stuck for ideas, I asked my guides to assist.

Their responses are in italics

So, what are the first things any newly discovered Empath should do?

We’ll look at seven steps that may well help any new Empath. While they are not in any particular order, they will be presented as one leading to the other.

Acceptance

Trusting in yourself.

Research

Self-awareness

Practicing your abilities

Grounding

Creating

Today we’ll look at Acceptance and Trusting in yourself.

Step one:

Acceptance.

One of the main problems with finding out that you’re an Empath is the doubt one feels. The first question they generally have is: Am I really an Empath?

The answer generally is, yes, you are. This is certainly true for those who fit the traits of an Empath. However, to their mind, it seems like such a big thing that they can’t comprehend it.

It’s as though you suddenly discover you have psychic powers (and you do) but in your mindset, this is something that only occurs in movies and fantasy fiction.

Comprehending that you are actually an Empath is hard because the first thought that tends to go through one’s mind is: It’s only me. I’m no one special. There must be some mistake!

I’m sure not everyone thinks that way, though.

Some are born self-aware and some have that self-awareness drummed out of them by their parents, peers and the religion they are born into. Generally, if you tell your ‘non-psychic’ friends that you may have some abilities, they will be prone to dismiss this, generally saying that you are just too oversensitive. This leads to invalidation and doubt.

There is a strange perception that someone else must know more than you do, even though they aren’t actually living your experiences. We let other people’s points of views and belief systems overwrite our own, and thus, we, ourselves, invalidate our belief systems.

So be aware of that. No one can really tell you what you feel and experience. You need to validate that for yourself.

Which brings us to the second step:

Trusting in yourself.

The biggest stumbling block with any psychic ability is that there is no trust that it is real, or that what you are feeling is correct.

It cannot be repeated often enough that your feelings are your truth. If something feels right for you, then it is right for you. If it doesn’t, and your intuition feels like it’s in panic mode, then take notice of that.

You don’t need outside validation. No amount of that will help you anyway. You will always doubt in your heart. You have to listen and trust in what you feel. 

Next: Part two: Research and Self-awareness

Past lives: Why we remember and why we don’t.


past lives clockIn my last entry, I asked the question: If past lives are not important, why do we remember them?

When I’m unsure of the answer, I’ll sometimes ask my guides to channel one. As usual, their response is in italics.

This dialogue also ended up being more personal than I thought it would, so if that kind of stuff does not interest you, feel free to skip it.

So, my question to you is: If past lives are not important, then why do we remember? In fact, why did you go out of the way to help me remember?

It very much depends on what your soul agenda is. Are you here to experience yourself in the presence of what is not you? If so, then it generally is not required that you remember who you are. You will experience this without knowing or remembering anything about your past or future existence. (Which is all happening now.)

So, what you’re saying is that if we want to just experience who we are, we need to forget everything so we can do this?

Yes. That is the basis of most people’s experience here. It doesn’t matter what they did or what they were before, they can choose to forget everything they ever knew and have a life that seems completely independent of everything they ever experienced. Of course, they will not remember this, so they will assume they have only one life.

Is this a good way to do such a thing? The answer is: depends. There is no right or wrong way, just what suits your purposes and soul agenda.

And some people have no other agenda than to live a life without any recall of their other ones.

You, on the other hand, are not here to just experience who you are. You have a very clear and defined agenda. In your case, it is quite important that you remember who you are, and why you are here.

I guess so. I’ve certainly got a few comments that me defining who I am, and who others are is not a good idea.

If it wasn’t what you needed to do, you simply wouldn’t be doing it. As I said, you have a very clear agenda in mind. You have a very lofty goal and you would have great difficulty achieving it without those memories. Do you think anything you’ve managed to do in the past 20 years would have been achieved if you had no clue as to how it all fitted together?

It’s possible. Things seemed to happen regardless of what I wanted. Especially back then.

Then you reached a point where you could proceed no further until you began to understand exactly who you were. You were even told this at the time (though you rejected it out of hand).

Okay, so whether it’s important for us to remember past lives depends on what we are here to do then?

Yes. As we said, you have very specific goals and agendas. You also have stated that you do not wish to return so you need to get it right ‘now’ and not stumble about blindly.

So… what exactly am I hear to do that is so important?

Your main agenda is to help people remember who they are. Give their power back to them and have them understand that they have the ability to create the life they desire. Too many feel they have no control and have to live with the hands they feel they are dealt with. Little do they realize that they choose those very hands they believe to be random.

How does me knowing who I am help here? Surely I can just read this stuff in books and pass on it on to others.

You can’t read in books what you have remembered. You can’t find that information online. It simply doesn’t exist at this point of time. No, you can only impart it once you remember it. And on that subject, when are you going to start doing so?

I thought I was already doing that. Isn’t that what this blog and my websites are all about?

In part. That is general information. The knowledge you can pass on can help explain why this world is in such a mess. It can explain why things happened the way they did. It can help people understand some of the history and what can be done to create a higher version of this life.

But you hold back on doing this. Why?

Maybe because the information is so out there, I would doubt it would be believed in any way shape or form.

So, you’re deciding for others if they are going to believe it not? Fear is never a good enough reason not to do something. Yes, your information might appear to be ‘out there’ but think about this. People, who are meant to find it, will find it. They can only find it if you’re ready to put it there.

Empath information is wonderful, but you have other things you can share. It’s time that people understood that they are not the only ones experiencing the things that you do. You can give them this gift. Don’t worry about how it will look. People will make their own decisions regardless of what you write. Some will accept it. Some will reject it. That’s not for you to decide. That is their own life-path. Your job is to make the information available. What people choose to do with it is then up to them.

Okay, well, I think I’ve gotten somewhat off the topic here.

No, the topic is why remember past lives? In order for you to do what you must do, you need to remember. It’s that simple.

So, to sum it up, it depends on the individual and what they wish to achieve?

Exactly. Hence, do not tell another what they should or should not try, especially if it feels right for them. You have to right to do what you need to do and they have the right to ignore you.

That sounds like an open invitation for chaos.

All actions have consequences. Always be mindful of that. If your actions do not reflect who you are, and where you going, then you are best not doing them. If you wish for chaos, act chaotically, but remember, you will end up in a world that reflects that. If you wish for peace, then act peacefully, and you will end up in the world that reflects that.

Choose wisely. 

Empath series: Beware of the holiday depression or Merry Christmas.


Empath ChatroomIt’s almost Christmas time.

Generally, it’s the period where people are happier and even the more hard-nosed of people tend to mellow out. Families gather, gifts are exchanged and we all eat way too much food.

Generally.

It’s also a time of great loneliness for many.

There are so many out there who feel lost and alone.

People who may have no one to be with during the holiday period.  Perhaps they have no family. Maybe they don’t feel they have friends. Perhaps they are at the age where everyone has left and all they have are memories of how wonderful things used to be when they were younger.

Maybe things aren’t going well in their life due to work situations, health, money, fears about loved ones or they just don’t feel they fit in and everyone is having one big, joyous party but them.

Even if you’re not a Christian. Even if you’re not religious. That sense of being alone will be intensified during those few weeks.

As Empaths, we are particularly vulnerable to those energies.

As December started, I started to see more and more people comment that they felt something bad was happening and they were feeling down without any obvious reason.

I believe they are picking up on those many others who feel alone.

The holiday season is a very big time for depression and many Empaths can’t wait for it to be done with so things can get back to normal.

For those of you who feel this pain, just remember you are not alone. There are many others out there who feel the same way, and many others who endure what seems like a torturous few weeks.

Just know that there are many ways to connect and support each other such as Empath forums, blogs or chat rooms.

I also have a free ad-free chatroom for this specific purpose. It has been open for the past five or so years. You don’t even need to register to login. You can just type in a name and join as a guest.

This is one of my gifts and services to the Empath community, so if you feel like trying to connect to others, please feel free to visit and say hi.

The room ebbs and flows with the amount of people who are there, but there are certainly people there every day, depending on the time.

Remember, you are not alone, and there is a lot of support for those who seek it.

You can find the Empath Chat Room at this link.

http://www.psi-zone.net/oldchat.html (or just click on the picture above.)

It requires Java to run (as do most chat of this kind.)

You can sign in as a guest by just typing a name into the User Name section or you can register a password protected name by using the ‘create new user account’ link underneath it.

The only rules are courtesy and validation.

Hope we get to see a few there.

I am not an animal, I’m a human being… or am I?


English: The Phoenix Firebird Deutsch: Der Pho...

Over the years, I’ve notice that people, in general, tend to react to me in various ways.

I seem to make many of them uneasy. Some instantly hate me (even if we never spoke) and some just seem to click with me. Not too many seem to be indifference to me.

Someone made a comment to me the other day that I don’t seem human at times.

It was an interesting comment that made me think.

Fact is: I’ve never felt ‘human’. By that, I mean, I’ve never felt I’ve fitted in. Even growing up, I couldn’t connect to others. I didn’t appear to have the same type of filters my peers and family did.

I didn’t have the same interest or awareness that other appeared to have. I spent most of the time in my mind and was often yelled at for being oblivious. (As though yelling was going to change that.)

As I grew older, I tried to fit in, but it just looked awkward and I felt there was always this invisible barrier between me and everyone else. I was always the odd person out and never invited to parties or to hang out with others.

When I did try to make the effort to mix, it just didn’t work.

I could put it down to my family life, which was traumatic, but lots of others had that, too, and they functioned with their peers just fine.

I made friends once I hit 16 years of age and seemed to be accepted more, however I still did not fit in. In fact, it got worse. I was labelled as weird, but at the same time, more and more people were drawn to me.  Some of them were almost obsessed with me.

Throughout it all, I never felt like I belonged. I felt terribly alone, and was always on the lookout for soul family members. That is: people who were not my blood family, but connected to me.

I don’t know how, but I knew they were out there, but how I was to find them eluded me.

When it comes down to it, I don’t think I feel what being human would feel like. I don’t experience lust and addictions, (unless you count chocolate). I have no interest in clubs, pubs, drinking, drugs, gangs, groups, etc. I don’t even see death in the same way others do.  Never have.

I did try. I would go to parties, joined my friends at nightclubs, tried discos (back in the 70s) and even went to a pub or two.

All were torture.

It’s hard for an Empath to describe what it’s like, but imagine yourself in a plastic bubble that is being buffeted by high winds from all direction. Add to that an inflatable hood that’s over your head, and the pressure is pumped up too high.  So you feel blocked off but overwhelmed. You can’t really function and the best you can do is nod and smile when someone tries to talk to you.

That’s how it is for me. It’s doubly worse because I didn’t have any interest in being in those places in the first place, but thought I should try them. I thought, hey, maybe it will be fun. It wasn’t. All I wanted to do was get the hell out at the first opportunity.

I always wondered to myself, do people actually enjoy these things? Are they really having a good time? What draws them back night after night? I didn’t understand back then and I still don’t understand today.

I’m sure I’m not alone here. There are people who class themselves as Otherkin and some who believe they are Starseeds.  And though I’ve never seen myself as those things, I certainly fit most of the signs they mention.

Being human is more than just being in a human body. At least, that’s what I feel.

How many reading this have felt the same way? Please feel free to comment.

I had this experience the other day or did I…?


Fraser Illusion

Experiences.

We are so ready to dismiss them.

Sometimes you experience something that feels very strong at the time, but when you come away from it, you wonder if you were just making it all up or you were mistaken.

I get this a lot. In fact, I can imagine my guides’ frustration as I tend to go back and forth on experiences which seem to fade in my memory almost as soon as they are done.

Why?

Maybe it’s because I have a really poor memory or part of me still has trouble accepting that the unbelievable is real. Or perhaps it’s fear that my ego is out of control and making it all up.

Either way, it’s frustrating: Very frustrating.

My own experiences are so unreal that after the event that I can’t even tell people about them. It’s as though I shift into another frame of mind.

What feels so compelling at the time will feel like someone who is out for attention.

I have to wonder, though: Can I afford to keep this up? Personally, I don’t think so. Personally, I feel that it’s time to stop doubting and just lay my cards on the table.

What bothers me  is that I’ve seen so many others do the same.

What they tell others seemed like rubbish to me. I’m not even sure if  they did experience something or if they just really just fooled themselves into believing their story.

Their stories just didn’t sound real. Or ring true.

While I didn’t sneer or call them out on those things, it did hurt their credibility, at least in my eyes and for those around them.

Then, on the other hand, there are certainly plenty of people for whom I accepted their stories and experiences without a second thought.

What is the difference between those I believe and those I don’t?

I feel, that in the end, it comes down to if you feel the resonance of truth behind their words.

As an Empath, I can sense if something is true or not. If it isn’t true, I will feel anger, antsy and extreme annoyance. (For instance, something I felt about a recently departed so called psychic and many who are still living and in the same line of work.)

In the end, you can only tell your story and trust that those who hear it will listen to their feelings and judge if it’s true or not.

I was going to write about an experience I had last week end, but ended up heading in another direction. So I’ll leave that for another entry.

So, how do others handle this conundrum? Do you believe what you experiences? Do you feel you can tell others? Have people believed you?

Please feel free to comment.

Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 3 Picking up on feelings or what station and I on?


English: Robert Plutchik's Wheel of Emotions

A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

 3.     Feeling others emotions and taking them on as your own: This is a huge one for Empaths. To some, they will feel emotions off those near by and with others they will feel emotions from those a vast distance away, or both. The more adept Empath will know if someone is having bad thoughts about them, even from a great distance.

This is essentially what defines an Empath. We can generally sense how people feel about us, even if what they show and what they think are two very different things.

The further removed you are from the person or the situation, the less likely you are to pick up their feelings.

That means that the more something or someone affects you, the stronger you will feel it.

This can be especially apparent at work. I could always tell when things were being done behind my back. I would always get a great sense of anxiety on the way home and sure enough, the next day, I would have received a nasty e-mail from someone, or find out someone had been attacking me. In all cases, the attacks were unjustified and unwarranted, especially as these people had nothing to do with me in my day to day job, and my work was always done quickly and to a very high standard.

My guides did not take kindly to those attacks either. They eventually took action.

You have some very protective guides. As you said, they don’t take kindly to attacks on you that you did not initiate. You will also notice that even though these people did exactly what they accused you of doing, you were the only one targeted. Also note that you were the only one trying to help people (and at times save their lives) at work. It is an oddity that, in this world, helping others is actively resisted by many.

However, what we want to discuss here is why we sense what others feel.

So, why?

We are all connected because we are one soul. Even though it is split into infinite aspects, the same energy still flows through it.

Now, that does not mean you will sense everything all at once. That’s not possible, or even healthy, unless you are on a much higher vibrational level.

What it does mean, though, is that the more you resonate with something, the more you will feel it.

Look upon people as transmitters. You are the receiver, and they are the station generating their thoughts and their feelings.

The only things you will pick up on are those you are tuned into. Now, it’s possible to have a broad range of frequencies that you can pick up on, but even that would be considered small considering that the range is infinite.

The more relevant and important something is to you, the stronger you will pick up on it. If a loved one is having a hard day, chances are, you, as an empath, will sense this.

If they are having a rough day and it’s due to you, then  you will certainly sense it very strongly.

If it’s an acquaintance, you can still pick up on their feelings, but generally only when you focus on it.

If someone is plotting behind your back, that information is important and relevant to you, so you will certainly feel something is going on.

In short, the further removed you are from the situation, the less likely you are to feel it.

But don’t some people feel everything all the time?

Not everything. They feel what they resonate with. If they resonate with fear, grief, trauma or anything that’s negative, they will most certainly pick up on all those things around them. Once again, it’s what you are attuned to. What frequency are you open to.

If someone has experienced danger and trauma in their past, they will always be open to such things because they will be trying to sense potential danger.

I will tell you this, though. The stronger the energy, the more likely people will pick up on it. Even non Empaths.

Great traumatic events, such as 9/11 was felt strongly around the world. Many psychics felt something horrible was going to happen weeks before it occurred. It was a major event.

The problem is, you can feel something is going to happen, but you can’t always work out what.

In the end, all you can do is send healing and positive energies to those feelings, and know they will help.

As an Empath, you are powerful. Enough Empaths sending positive energy and love to those they see as negative could heal this world and it wouldn’t take long.

Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 2 – Crowds or party on, dude???


Massive crowds after the fireworks

A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

2.     Being in public places can be overwhelming: Places like shopping malls, supermarkets or stadiums, where there are lots of people around, can fill the Empath with turbulently vexed emotions that are coming from others.

 Personally, I don’t mind shopping males and supermarkets. I’ve not really been to a stadium. At least, not in the past 30 years.

I don’t like some crowded places, such as the city on new year’s eve.

I really detest parties and night clubs. That’s like hell on earth for me.

It very much depends on the type of energy that is around you. When people gather together en masse, it creates a strong field that the Empath can easily pick up on. If the energy resonates with the Empath, they will feel at home. If not, then they will try to exit the first chance they can do it politely.

Now if you’re a sensitive type of person, you will find that alcohol fueled parties might well be  difficult to handle because alcohol often unleashes certain emotions that are often repressed.

If the Empath is already sensitive towards such things, they will find they are magnified.

I can’t say I noticed that, myself. I found it was more… I didn’t fit in and I also felt overwhelmed.

Yes, that is another thing worth understanding. Empaths will often feel like they don’t belong to such groups. These are the same people who can’t seem to connect socially. Yes, it’s true that they work fine one on one, but the bigger the crowd, the harder it becomes.

And why is that?

It’s due to actually not really belonging to certain groups. Some people are here to help, but that does not mean they are part of the people who they are helping. Now, let’s take you, personally.

You don’t drink, smoke, do drugs, enjoy parties, clubbing, demeaning people, gossip and sport like activities.

Those are all common interests that people share. You would rather go to a quiet place, have a coffee and a bite to eat and talk about spiritual topics, or something light-hearted.

While you might not find many people who you can connect to on those levels, you can certainly be sure that you are not the only one who feels that way. There are millions upon millions of others who can’t connect in this fashion. Yet, in spite of the numbers, they are sprinkled amongst the billions of people in this world. It is not unusual for someone to go through their entire life and never realize they have met someone else who feels the way they do. This may be especially due to other Empaths trying to fit in and pretend they have the interests that others have.

Add to that places that have a concentration of such people, you may not be able to function. Especially if it is filled with smoke, club music, noise, drugs and drunkenness. You will be overwhelmed with the very energies that you spend your time avoiding. You will not know what to do, let alone even function.

Many will dismiss you as a ‘party pooper’. Some will look at you and wonder what your problem is. It would be rare for anyone to realize that this is hell for the Empath, and the best thing they can do for them is to take them outside and away from the crowd.

That is also why other kinds of crowded places may not be a problem for the Empath. Malls, plaza’s, places of fun, movie theatres, etc, generally bring out the good energy in people. Some people love shopping. Others enjoy the entertainment.

Come Christmas time or a major holiday, there will be many who are pushed for time, stressed, short of money and feeling obliged to make a purchase.  Their emotions will be running high, especially when they are with a family of tired and cranky children. That is when it’s wise to avoid such crowds.

I can’t help but wonder… do people really enjoy parties? What do they get out of it?

Being with others who they can connect to. Isn’t that enough? They may not even be happy or enjoy being there, but they are with others and they can try and forget about feeling lonely and alone, at least for a little while.

So, any advice on how to cope in crowds?

Remember, the key to controlling your empathy is being grounded. The key to being grounded is your self-confidence. If you are not feeling like you belong somewhere, you will certainly not enjoy the experience. You will feel like an intruder or an outsider. 

Most Empaths who can’t tolerate crowds stay as long as they feel is politely possible, and then make their exit. They believe they will offend the host, or maybe the guest, so they hang around.

Sometimes it’s just wise to explain that you don’t function well in such situations, and you need to leave. If they don’t understand or accept this, then really, you’re better off without such people in your life. You will always feel alone, even in the most crowded place.

Yes, but remember, when you’re with friends, or with a partner, that’s not always an option. And that does not mean those people aren’t good for you in other circumstances.

That is so, however, remember they should allow for such things. If you explain you can’t cope, then that is just you being you. If they can’t tolerate that, then you are better off without them.

Remember, the more you are you, the more others will find you because you are what they are looking for.

As always, I will suggest a Bach Flower Remedy that helps.

Elm is the remedy for feeling overwhelmed, and that certainly can be useful when you’re hit with all those energy from a crowd.  

Empath Guidebook – Now fully edited.


Empath cover version 1Just a quick note.

The Empath Guidebook (my free e-book) has been fully edited by the amazing Julianne Victoria.

My heartfelt thanks for doing what is a tedious and meticulous job.  I’m sure those who read the edit version will certainly thank you, too!

It’s rare to find someone so selflessly giving of their abilities and time.

I really do recommend visiting her sites (all listed below). There is a lot to this lady and she has a lot to share.

Through the Peacock’s Eyes, Insights for Spiritual Living

On the Streets of San Francisco, Photography

Facebook

Twitter

Haiku By Ku, A Poetic Pup’s Poem

Swami Zoe’s Yoga and Zen

Thank you for the gift you have given to the Empath Community.

This guidebook is ever evolving, so from time to time, there should be some major updates. Watch this space.

Empath Series: 30 Traits of an Empath by Just Be – Trait 1 – Knowing or what is truth?


A while ago, I came across an amazing blog called 30 Traits of an Empath which covered many more traits than I come across before. They were written in a very clear and succinct way.  

I approached the author, a very humble person, to see if she or he (I can’t be sure on the gender) would give me permission to discuss them with my guides and post them here. I was told that I may.

The traits will be presented in their original form and if you wish to see the entire list, (and if you haven’t, I really recommend that you do) you can do so here.

As always my guide’s responses are in italics.

  1. Knowing: Empaths just know stuff, without being told. It’s a knowing that goes way beyond intuition or gut feelings, even though that is how many would describe the knowing. The more attuned they are the stronger this gift becomes.

I have to say, this is one of the biggest ones for Empaths. The Knowing is something that just happens. I discussed this a little a while back when I said that people have a window to fool an Empath, and then somehow, the Empath just knows if they are being lied to or not. You can’t fool them after that.

I’ve experienced this Knowing a lot. It’s a feeling that, in spite of all the evidence to the contrary, you know the truth.

I’ve read about this kind of thing happening to people whose partner cheat on them. They suddenly just know.

Unfortunately, this is never enough to convince others. Your sense of truth rarely convinces another that you are right and other people are wrong.

This is one of the abilities that Empaths have. It works because they are able to connect to the collective consciousness that all are a part of.

Remember, there is really only one soul, and everything is an aspect of it. All that is, is already part of your being.

The illusion is that you are separate from everything else, and this is so we can experience ourselves in relation to those other parts.

But it is an illusion, and those who are Empathic will be connected, in spite of the illusion.

The closer to the situation someone is, the more attuned they may become, and the easier they will pick up on the truth of the matter.

That might explain why I feel anger when I sense something isn’t true.

That’s an anger borne of frustration as your sense of truth is being compromised. It should be noted, though, that there is a knowing, and there is a logic that people attempt to apply to truth.

By that I mean, you will know when someone is true. It will stand alone, as is. Those who try to get to the truth, using logic, will sense the truth of the logic, and thus assume that the outcome of that logic is the truth. It doesn’t follow that this is so, though.

I’m not quite following here.

You may sense the truth of what you are focusing on. It does not necessarily follow that the outcome of that truth is true.

For instance, you might say it rains during Summer. This is true. It does not follow, though, that it will rain. Logic dictates that rain is likely, so you will sense the truth behind that, however, there may be a drought, and no rain will come.

Sensing the truth of a statement of logic, and sensing the truth of an outcome are two different things.

Also remember, that things are always changing. What you sense today may not be what you sense tomorrow. New information may be sensed and you now have an updated version of the truth.

So, how do you know when you’ve reach the final truth?

You don’t really. You will just know what is true for you at that point of time. However, generally, you will sense that you need to sense, and that is what is important here. Truth is personal, and what may be true for you, may not be true for another.

Isn’t truth just truth? If something is true, then it’s has to be true across the board, right?

Some truths are. However,  as we create our own reality, others may not be. If I tell you it’s a hot day, and it’s only 20 degrees Celsius, you will not agree. To you, hot would be above 30 degrees Celsius. However, my truth is that I find 20 degrees hot.

Truth is individual because it’s relative.

Also, do not confuse truth with universal law.

So, if someone believes that the Earth is flat, that does not make it so.

Their perception is that it’s flat, and that is their truth based on the evidence presented and accepted. That is not what I’m talking about, though. Universal laws are those laws that work regardless of what you believe in. However, that’s really another topic.

So, in summary, Empaths have a Knowing because they are connected to their oneness and can pick up what is happening.

And the closer they are to the situation, the more attuned they may become.

From a Bach Flower Remedy point of view, I’ve found that Cerato, which is the remedy for intuition, to be very useful for clarifying truth and helping with intuition.  

Empath Series: Death or Why? – Part 2


Loss

I’ve covered this subject before, but there are people, who from time to time, find this article and have told me they’ve found it useful.

I thought I’d post what I’ve previously written here for those who have not read it yet.

This is a channeled conversation with the answers indented in italics. 

This channel continues on directly from the previous entry.

This I know, though I’m working to keep this useful for empaths in general.

It is an example. For many, death is often a catalyst for growth and awareness. They move into things that they were unlikely to do before.

There is also a belief that we must feel sad for the departed, otherwise we are a bad or uncaring person. If we do not mourn, or do not go through a certain period of time of grieving, then we may feel guilt over it.

Guilt is often a reason why we hang onto grief. We ask ourselves: how much did we really love this person if we can just move on without any sense of loss or pain. How will others view us if we are seen to ‘not care’? How do we see ourselves if we find that we don’t wish to suffer for the loss of another?

Yet, make no mistake; the departed does not need you to grieve for them. Once they reach the light, they are in bliss, and more often than not, the concerns of this world are left behind.

That does not mean they are forgotten, and when you call on your loved ones, they will come and leave many messages in many ways that they are there. Some even will manifest themselves so they can show the ones left behind that they are just fine, and they will look just beautiful.

They are fine. They are more than fine. They are home.

To those who have lost one dear to them, I promise you that you will see them again. You will be reunited, and if you both so choose, you will live more lives together for as long as you desire.

It’s one thing to know this on an intellectual level, but how do you translate this to the emotional level? How do you bring comfort to those who have lost their loved ones? Saying that they aren’t really gone doesn’t seem to be all that useful.

As I said, it is natural to feel grief for the loss of someone dear. There is also a fear that your life may never be the same, and that you cannot cope without them. They may have been tremendous support, or loved you unconditionally, or they may have been the breadwinner.

Fear is one of those emotions that is intertwined with the sense of loss. Fear for the future, fear that they won’t be able to cope alone or be capable of carrying on looking after family or children.

Death is not about the ones who have passed over, but those who are left behind.

So, how does the empath cope with death?

The key is shifting your understanding and perspective of death. Do not look upon it as something that should not have happened. If it was not meant to occur, then it would not have occurred. This does not mean you suddenly dismiss the pain, nor do you suddenly decide that it is irrelevant. It simply means that you are seeing things in a more holistic manner.

Those who you truly love will never truly leave you. They are there. They are by your side when you call, and they are helping you. You may not always feel them, but they are there.

The shift in understanding and perspective is key to coping with the sense of loss.

Do not harbour feelings of guilt of another’s death.

Do not feel that your own life is ending because someone has departed.

Do not fear that you cannot cope. You will always have what you need to make it through, and indeed thrive.

Life is about the growth and experience of the soul, and such things can be powerful catalysts.

For my own comments, I’ve found that Bach Flower Remedies can be very comforting at a time like this.

For instance:

Star of Bethlehem   to help with the shock of a loved one’s death.

Sweet Chestnut to help move from a place where you can’t accept someone is gone.

Willow if you are feeling like a victim.

Pine if you carry any guilt.

Holly for the anger you may feel.