Empath Series: What is a soul call or why am I falling in love with someone I don’t love?

There are many Empaths who are on a path where they have an overwhelming desire to help and heal others. Some choose to put themselves in the service of God (or whatever force they believe in) while others work to help those who ask for it, or need it.

From time to time, they will get what is called a Soul Call.

There isn’t much information about on this subject for some reason.

I’ve known this terms for a long time and understood what it meant, but searching on the web, it seems that there is no information there (apart from what I’ve put there myself) and I find this odd, but then again, when I started with putting Empath information on the web, I was the only one who had done it at that point, and now it’s got many resources. Maybe this subject will go the same way.

So, what is a soul call?

I define it as follows:

A soul call is a cry for help from one soul to another. It is a desire, a prayer, a request to the universe, to God, or whatever you have chosen to believe in, to bring aid and help deliver the caller from their current situation. 

I believe that no prayer goes unanswered. It may not be answered in the way you expect it to be, and you may choose to ignore the answer because you don’t agree with it, (at least at the time) but it does get answered.

One of the ways is the Soul Call.

Someone may be in a very dark place, they see no way out, they have lost all hope, and they cry out for help.

The person who has agreed to be of service, or seeks to help others, or even wishes to grow in spirit, will feel an unmistakable pull towards the caller.

At its strongest, a soul call will feel like the helper is falling in love with the caller. They will feel a strong compulsion to see the person, find out their history, know all they can about them, and take every opportunity to be with them.

If they try to ignore this feeling, it will get stronger until it is almost irresistible.

Misunderstood, a soul call might turn into a romantic relationship, which tends to end once the call is completed. This can become very complicated for both parties, as they don’t understand what is really going on.

Next: Part 2 where we’ll look at the types of calls one might get.

60 thoughts on “Empath Series: What is a soul call or why am I falling in love with someone I don’t love?

  1. I have been trying to find words for this for years! I really thought I was the only one experiencing this. I have had this happen quite a few times throughout my life. It was’t until the last few years I’ve begun to kind of make sense of it, before that I just thought I was crazy. It’s so strange, one day I see this person like I see everyone else. Then, in the blink of an eye they are stuck in my head. It’s like all of my empathetic abilities are tuned into their unique channel. I can feel what they feel from miles away, both emotionally and physically (I often get confirmation without even asking for it). I also feel this magnatism to them. I want to be in there presence as much as possible. It does feel like I’m falling in love with them but usually not in a romantic or sexual way, in an unconditional agape way. They usually are these strong people (usually other women) that I initially look up to or are even intimidated by. One was a supervisor of mine and a current one is my manager. They always have this strong exterior but once the connection happens I feel so much pain buried within them. They always end up deeply opening up. Sometimes this will go on for years with the same person. I actually find it really beautiful. I feel no judgment toward them. I don’t want anything from them other than to be around them, listen to them, and help them find peace. And then it ends, sometimes abruptly, and other times more gradual. Once it ends my feelings for them go back to normal, like before. I’m really happy to finally get some validation on this. Thank you!


      1. I know, it’s strange that there is so little information on it. I’ve been searching online for years but I didn’t know there was a term for it. I just thought I must be nuts 😂 It has been happening to me since I was kid. It definitely is a frustrating thing to go through when you don’t understand it.


        1. Yes. I do my best to get that info out there, but I don’t want to harp on it like a one trick pony lol.

          Weird thing is, I knew what it was called when it was happening. The only other time I’ve heard someone use the term was when I felt the call to help a dark being called Omen. He mentioned it in a conversation I was having with him. I asked him where he got the term from.

          He said: It’s a soul call, everyone knows what it is… we use the same terminology.


  2. Here is an interesting situation Gary. I’ve not been able to figure this out because it doesn’t make logical sense. I am a sensitive but only of the following types; clairaudient, intuitive and clairsentience in the form of claircognizance, not an empath which is the other half of clairsentience.

    My problem is that I’m attracting way too many empaths and they fall in love with me but on all of my social media profiles and in real life, I warn them that I’m aromantic and hetero-demisexual. What that means is that I don’t have romantic feelings for these women at any time and never will, never had in the past. Demisexuality is, normal sexuality but you have to have a very deep platonic connection with an individual before sexual attraction can occur (doesn’t mean it will but it can happen).

    My biggest problem with these empaths is that they are coming off as Cluster B personality types, some actually have personality disorders of this cluster but some don’t. I don’t want to be their shrink and don’t want to be gaslighted into a relationship with them. However, I’ve never had a normal person (non psychic) approach me and try this. It almost seems that they are the ones sending out the soul call and I’m supposed to do something about it.

    Although, I can’t help them, not in the romantic sense nor in regards to their out of control empathic ability. I can’t help them because they fail to realize they’re the ones who are sick and don’t really want my help (at least not on a physical and mental level). I came to the realization many years ago that if someone who doesn’t physically tell you they need your help, let alone being sincere about it, that I should never consider helping them. Because if you try to help them and they didn’t ask, that’s considered hostile activity and will be seen as a psychic attack or at the very least a psychic vampire.

    Gary, it puts me in a really strange and awkward position in dealing with these empaths. I don’t really know how to deal with them, I’m at a complete loss on how to proceed.

    It works like this;

    1. Empathic women fall in love with me, they “need” me.

    2. I’m aromantic, I explain what it is and how it relates to me and to them.

    3. I explain I’m here as a friend / platonic partner possibly sexual but not to count on sex as a component of the friendship. I’m upfront about what I am but it doesn’t seem to matter to them.

    4. I don’t, “need” these empathic women, it’s, “nice to be friends” with the, “level headed” empathic women.

    5. The one sided empathic romantic relationship goes sour every time, I’m to blame for their pain, no matter what. I’m the devil, the narcisstic or the psychopath or what other bullsh*t they can come up with. They don’t even consider my side of the story or how I feel about the forced relationship status. It apparently means nothing to them, it’s all about empath’s feelings and not my own. But… I can’t have my own feelings other than what they expect or they’ll go ballstic. Which I learned how to tune out my emotions when I around them and stick to logical / cognitive reasoning only so there’s not a fight brewing.

    6. I explained to them in a logically manner the difference between Cluster B personalities and an aromantic. Aromantics have empathy but we also don’t like getting hit with gaslighting and the Fear, Obligation, Guilt (FOG) tactics. I explain to them what they have been doing and that I don’t appreciate their manipulation tactic that they’re employing. A person with empathy will tell the other person that they are of a certain type, to warn them not to, “fall in love” because their romantic needs will go unmet. A Cluster B doesn’t tell people at all, loves to mess with people and extracts supply (attention and physical items or money) from everyone. Cluster B personality types don’t actually love anyone at any level, not even themselves.

    7. I break the relationship off, even as friends, although they find some way to follow and try to get into the old relationship with me but there really wasn’t one there to begin with, other than at a platonic level. Going no contact with an empath is quite literally impossible, they find ways around the conventional blocks I put in place.

    8. I’ve realized that psychotherapy doesn’t work for empaths at all. I don’t know if it’s their inability to separate their emotional body from their cognitive processes or if it’s something else entirely, something I’ve missed.

    9. They want to be in a phantom relationship with me because I represent a father figure in their life. However, from a level of an empath, I can’t possibly give them the volume of love in which their soul really needs to heal, it’s as if they’re a black hole, their heart is an unrequitted love cesspool.

    10. The empathic women that I’ve encountered can’t tell the difference between, “I love you” and, “I’m in love with you”. The latter is romantic, the prior is mature / real love. They tend to freak out if I give them real love instead of the romance their expecting (which isn’t actually love at all, it’s limerance). Limerance is a fancy word
    for explaining the temporary insanity of falling in love; the indulgance in infaturation and fantasy. I won’t give them what they want because it feels wrong to me. Why do something that is only acting and not real? They would go after me for doing that, if I were to even try it. I’m damned if I do, damned if I don’t. I’d rather be damned for sticking up for myself, my orientations and being myself (maybe being by myself).

    Gary, perhaps you may have some insights on these empathic women for which I can’t actually see or experience that might make sense to me. Do get back to me, if you can. I’d really like to get this sorted out, learn what I need from this process and what’s really going on. Then to, “stop attracting them” if it’s even remotely possible.

    Under normal circumstances, dealing with Cluster B personality types is easy for me but dealing with empaths who are also have Cluster A or B personality disorders is really tough, to say the least. They use your emotions against you with laser focus. It’s not a generalized emotional attack, it’s a tactical take down, if they don’t get what they want. However, I’ve never gave in and never would. I wanted to see if there is a way to get through and get them to stop because they’re an empath. They can feel other peoples’ emotions and their own with such intensity. I don’t want these women to hurt themselves; I don’t want them to get hurt trying to contol me or be in a single sided romantic relationship with me. I want them to heal, even if it’s not me who helps them.

    I’m throughly convinced that the reason why this is happening is, that I’m supposed to learn something from all of them but so far, this lesson appears to be quite elusive, as are the answers to it. Perhaps it’s staring me right in the face the whole time and I don’t see it. I also acknowledge that they too have something to learn from me but I’m unsure as to what that is. Perhaps, it could be learning tolerance of people that are different than they are, that not every guy they get into a relationship with them is there as their toy or romantic partner. As you can see from my long winded posted, I’m ill equipped in dealing or, “caring for” empathic women.

    Truth be told; empathic women in general, creep me out. Never used to be this way until I turned 15, I’m now 42. I’m a loner out of choice to avoid the eventual questions that women have when they find out I’m straight but not married and don’t have kids.


    1. My goodness Lex, you’ve just compiled a list of so many of the women I’ve come across.

      It’s thoroughly frustrating and yes, they don’t listen. They are completely convinced that you are meant to be with them and are experts at guilting you into trying to be with them.

      In my experience, most of the women who have targeted me obsessively that way have a past life connection to me. Several of them seem to be the same soul in different bodies. It’s almost as though one person is writing the same script for them all.

      Looks carefully at those who are doing this to you. You might well find their energy / features are very similar and even their way of being seems to be the same. If this is the case, you’ve got an astral stalker on your hands.


      1. That’s a great relief to find out I’m not alone in dealing with crazy making empaths, guys do it too, not just women. However, I don’t have any problem with men but have heard of it happening to other people.

        I was starting to see that their energy looks identical of those I knew in past lives. It’s really sad that they were like this before they were born in these bodies, hopefully one lifetime they have sometime in the future it will be sorted out for them and they heal themselves.

        Yeah, I’ve had real world stalkers some Cluster Bs and some that apparently couldn’t get enough of me the first time (although, I don’t consider myself a catch by any means). Perhaps it’s because I’m an anomaly wrapped up in an enigma that drives them to these lengths. That I’m some gift / prize to behold and figure out. Humorous way to look at it, really.

        Thanks for your input, Gary, it means a lot to me. I would like to apologize for that long winded post from before. Quite a bit of energy behind it, too.


        For any women that happen to be empaths that are reading this post; I don’t see all lady empaths as sick, only some of them (the ones that won’t leave me be or refuse to see the truth for what it really is). I’m not trying to be an insensitive jerk, just understand what makes empaths tick, let alone the sick ones. So, in the future I could be more understanding and work with empaths that ask for my help.


      2. From reading your other material about Omen, Jack, Triquerta and “Before I continue…”, I now know why these Clusterf*cked empaths are latching onto me.

        You’re quote, “Be careful what you ask for because you might just get it… is very true. Especially if you’re a powerful manifester.”

        I’m very tuned and honed at manifesting. Looks like I’m doing it to myself or I should say, allowing it to happen at one level. The astral version of narcissistic supply is the life force / soul energy, now everything makes perfect sense.

        You’re a genius, Gary! Thanks again!

        Liked by 1 person

          1. Sure, should I find more receptive folks, I’ll send them to your sites.

            On another note, it occurred to me, something funny about Jack. Would his last name be, “Ass”, during this lifetime. From the pompous, arrogant prick he comes off as, I wouldn’t be surprised that his last name would be that or at least sound like it.


          2. lol… I never quite found out who Jack was. I did come across him once and removed that mask for his, only to find he had a portal like vortex where his face should have been. I’ve kind of stayed clear since then.


          3. Gary,

            Ask Omen direct questions.

            1. Do you know your origin?

            Tell me (meaning you) his exact origin.

            2. Ask Omen if he knows who Osmen is?

            Have him explain who is Osmen.

            3. Ask Omen if he knows who is Ose is?

            Have him explain who is Ose.

            4. Ask Omen if he knows who is 616 is?

            Have him explain who is 616.

            Gary, I will tell you later why I’m having you ask Omen these questions. It’s why he’s really with you / why you were, “approached”. The reason why Jack (as I now know his identity, rather; what he is instead of a who) let him go so easily. Demons don’t just approach to be purchased; it’s one of two things, either he’s in deep shit or he’s giving you deep shit / lying to you.

            I’ve encountered an individual with a vortex for a face as well but never saw the mask; there is but one entity that does this and it’s bad, really bad. If Omen says he can’t remember any of those names and explain them to you, he’s lying. He does know them.


          4. I’ve not actually spoken to Omen for a while now so unable to ask any such questions. As for his origin, I’m aware of it, though this is not the place to discuss it. There is an abundance more info that I’ve not actually spoken about. I am aware of 616 being the original number for 666, and I would say 666 is the correct number as it ties in with it all. And there is certainly connections there, though I will address that all at some point, too.


      3. Men Empaths are equally obsessive are you claim your experiences with women are. I as a woman can confirm this. Obsessive male empaths are a common breed.


  3. Gary, thank you so much for this post. I have just completed my first soul call and it is this blog that kept me going when I might have otherwise thought I was having a total mental breakdown.
    I would like to write this story down here, now that it’s over, to help someone else who might find themself at a loss as to their feelings Versus the pull of a Soul Call. I’ll try to keep it short and sweet.
    Two years ago we relocated our business to a new town. On the first day I took a stroll up the main street and passed the local coffee shop. Out the front was a young man wiping down tables and we looked at each other. There was an electric current – literally – we were pinned. I was not physically attracted to this man in ANY way and I certainly didn’t know him, but I walked away with a knowing that this man was profoundly trapped in his own life and VERY sad.
    Moving on with my own daily routine, a few weeks later I was working at my desk and I suddenly felt an overwhelming sadness come over me and I heard the words in my head that said “I’m so lost”. I instantly wanted to cry. I looked out my window to see this same young man walking passed with the saddest expression, deep in his own thoughts and somehow I just KNEW it was him saying those words in my head. That was the moment. Soul call received! I just didn’t know it then.
    Immediately taking to Google, I started researching all about feeling and/or hearing another persons feelings (something that makes me laugh now…I had certainly never needed to google that before!). I found some information that enlightened me to Empaths. I immediately realised that I have been an Empath all my life. In this regard I certainly have a long way to go in understanding this ability better.
    Moving on with my Soul Call though, my mind became totally obsessed with this man, I simply could not stop thinking, wondering what could be troubling him and how I could get close enough to him to find out and SAVE him. I began feeling depressed for the first time in my life. My mind was speaking silent phrases to me that FELT like they belonged to me, but didn’t relate to my actual life situation. Phrases such as: “I need to change my life”; “I can’t live like this anymore”; and repeatedly “I’m so lost”. I began crying any time I found myself alone, just bursting into tears with these thoughts that confused and scared me. I’d look in the mirror and ask myself “What is wrong with you?”. Having only recently learned the concept of Empathetic abilities I was skeptical but determined to keep in mind the idea that these MAY not be my own feelings, but I’ll admit that it is very difficult to swallow…I have always been an extremely rational person. But the real me simply did not get depressed, I did not cry in this way, I wasn’t feeling lost and I certainly didn’t want to change my life! So what the hell was happening to me? I desperately wanted this man in my life! A feeling possibly stronger than feelings I have had for men that I have loved and wanted. But I didn’t even know him! And it was very much taking away from my blisfully happy marriage!
    I kept Googling like a maniac. That’s when I typed in “Why do I feel I’m in love with a person who I KNOW I’m not in love with!?”. I knew it wasn’t love because I would see him with his girlfriend and I never felt jealous! You can understand my utter confusion.
    I read your descriptiion of a Soul Call and it screamed out at me YES!!! But I hadn’t even begun my journey. I had a name for it but it certainly didn’t take away from the powerful pull that was with me all day and night, in my dreams, it was everywhere. I was emotionally locked in!
    I’ll cut the story short to say that after MANY unnecessary coffees and 2 years I was finally given an opportunity to get to know this person, and it was instigated by him out of the blue. I can’t tell you happy that made me. Instant relief! We have been meeting for an hour each week for a language lesson (he is the teacher) and when we are finished our lesson, we chat. Slowly at first but over a period of months I have successfully earned his trust and he has finally opened up to me. He is foreign and his parents and family are heavy influences in his life. Guilt plays a very big part in his daily decisions.
    I have finally passed on the message I know I have been called upon to give to him. The message was: You have permission to live your OWN life, don’t let your family decide your life for you. They are living theirs and you are entitled to be free of guilt. You are your own person.” I had alluded to it several times over the months but this week I know the message was received because I literally drove home feeling as light as a feather. Two years! He told me he is buying his own home this week, totally against his fathers wishes and has the courage to do so because of the stories I have shared with him about my own life and my need for personal freedom, how I would never let anyone hold me back from living my life and how he admires my strength… Somewhere along the way it got through and now I’M FREE again.
    Thanks so much Gary! If it were not for finding this blog early enough I may have given up on the real love of my life for this Soul Call. I’m so thankful I didn’t.
    Keep up the great work x


  4. Thank you Gary, for writing this, very good information, I rarely see an article written about empathic work which is truthful. As an Empath I rarely fall in love with the one I am helping I made a decision to be dispassionate with clients a long time ago when I found myself weeping whilst giving a cancer patient healing, this was doing neither of us any good. They required my Soul Love sensitivity and strength to help them through their dis-ease.

    People who come into your life as “friends” users can draw on your Soul Love and greater understanding. I understand most people which is surprise to many and they start to fall in love with me, this can be difficult from my part. I have had to learn that for me to be in a relationship with someone they have to be strong and not be dependent on me for their strength i.e them being an energy vampire. These types can be magnetic and charismatic until they have received all they want of you. Their mission was to be destructive and unfortunately many of them achieve it, it takes a lot of strength to keep picking yourself up and building on your own strength. Thank you also for like my post on Empathy.


    1. Thanks for your thoughts and yes, I’ve had to do the same thing. It’s a problem when people start to fall in love with you. They become obsessed and blame you for their feelings. They also refuse to listen to any reason.


    2. Also, I found your comment about finding articles about empathic work being truthful interesting. I don’t read them myself (so I don’t inadvertently steal their ideas) but would have thought they should at least be accurate. I’d love to know more.


  5. I had an old friend pop into my life and felt drawn instantly. He was going through alot of stress. I couldn’t stop thinking about him and I didn’t know why. It got worse when we started seeing eachother. It scared me as I didn’t understand it. It became an obsession I was trying to fight. I researched all avenues from metaphysical to psychological. But nothing fit until now…the soul call. We stopped seeing eachother due to an argument where he told me he didn’t want my help or support and i thought i was free as I didn’t want a relationship with him. I stopped contacting him but he shows up at my work and tells me his problems, we were friends first after all. Even though we’re friendly, the obsession I have is still there i can still feel him and his pain and it won’t go away…..It’s been 5 months now. He said he didn’t want my help but I’m still his sounding board….what am I missing?


    1. Sounds like he’s playing the aloof / victim game to me. It’s a method of getting attention from others. I suspect that he is still focused on you, especially if he is still offloading onto you. I would lay it on the line, personally. If he doesn’t want your help, then he can also stop using and possibly draining you.


      1. I tried ignoring him. I didnt talk to him for over a month but I still couldn’t stop thinking about him. I just want the obsession to stop. He’s been sick and didn’t tell me but I knew as I felt all the pains. I know he isnt good for my soul so how do I make it stop. Thanks by the way…


    2. I hope you do not mind me giving a reply. You need to protect yourself from these kinds of people to stop the draining. The fact that he is always focusing on you means he is knowingly or unknowingly projecting his spiritual energy onto you, which is not good at all, it is a form of psychic attack and this is why you having feelings of obsession. They are his obsession with you. I would advise you need a strong form of protection and clearing done to stop this. Perhaps Gary may be able to assist you with this, but it is definitely my field of expertise. Blessings


      1. Thanks for your message. It’s been a hard road, I’ve never encountered someone that affected me so much and I knew he was draining me which is why I wanted it to stop. He’s extremely powerful and his energy felt like a mixture of all types of pain. But I’m free now. I still see him at work but don’t engage. I feel better and aware. Thanks


  6. Hi I’m a teenage girl I’ve known I was an empath for a while now, just didn’t necessarily know what to call it. Anyways, I’ve been talking to this college guy for 6 months now and we’ve gotten very close never into a relationship because of the age and the fact that I’m in highschool but I was very attracted to him and I never knew why but I’m starting to realize why it was because I knew he needed help or that something was wrong I mean it was also that he didn’t try so hard to try to get me and that also drew me but it was mutual. I just am trying to understand why after all this time we’re still talking and why my feelings have gotten stronger through the times. I’m pretty sure he’s clinically depressed he over eats, and uses drugs and alcohol as an escape. Every time I’ve seen him recently he’s opened up more to me about it I feel like I’m giving him all the help and advice and he really cares what I think and say as he constantly asks my opinion on everything for some reason as if he needs my approval. He jokes around sometimes saying I sound like his mom since some of the advice I’ve given for his depression his mom has also said the exact thing. I think I’m falling for him but I’m not sure if I should, he always says how much he misses me and how I don’t miss him even though I really do ( mind you, I stopped talking to him for a month and a half recently) but I had to because I felt like I was being used. Sometimes I still feel that way but recently he’s made me think differently as if he really does care about me and possibly love me, even though he’s never said so. I feel like he has hard time speaking out on his feelings for me or in general himself. I’m just very confused I love being with him and cuddling and hanging along with helping him emotionally but when I leave the next morning after sleeping over I feel so sad and I don’t know if I’m picking up his emotions or if I’m really sad because I’m seeking his love. Please please help I don’t know who else will understand this or if I do but anyone would be of help thank you !💙


    1. Hi, Hanna,

      Sounds slightly complicated. I suppose the question is, is he interested in moving past the depression, as there are ways of doing it without anti depressants. (You can search keyword depression on this blog for some details.)

      I guess one way to know if you want him in your life is to imagine him not in your life and see how you feel. If it’s a soul call, though, you may well feel that compulsion regardless. They can be pretty easy to identify after a bit of practice, though.

      In any case, you may be in his life to help point him in the right direction, but it’s always up to him on what he decides to do. Just be careful that you’re not being used or that he’s not a narcissist or a sociopath.


  7. I have always been a magnet for lost souls. As a teenager I was pulled towards a young man whom I loved and will always love, but was never romantically involved with. I did not understand why until now. He ultimately took his own life. I could not help him.
    Recently I was pulled toward a man from my past who was in a very dark place. That is also how I met him. I feel that I failed to help him both times, because I have always interpreted my feelings for him as romantic. He ended up withdrawing completely, but has opened himself up again empathically, I suppose, in the last couple of days. The pull is VERY strong. I do not know if I should reach out again with this new understanding that I have information to deliver and nothing more. I do think I found this post for a reason, but maybe it is too late.


    1. All you can do is go with your feelings. But also take note of them as you do things. You can’t save people. They can only save themselves. But you can be there for their support. Ultimately, you are not responsible for anyone but yourself, but make sure you follow your feelings so you know you did what you were meant to do.


  8. The situation that you are describing is confusing for everyone involved in the soul call event. The person I have helped sometimes uncovers a traumatic experience. How do complete my relationship with other person? Because the intense nature of soul calls, I like to be sure that no bad feelings exist or that anything has been left unsaid when my work has been completed? I feel like the person I have helped may need know this n order to deal with the issues that have come up. Is it safe to assume that the person I have assisted is fine after I have completed my work? If so, I know that I was blessed to have been a part of that person’s life at that time. Thanks Gary.


    1. It very much also depends on what the soul agreement was. Sometimes you will indeed enter into a relationship to fulfil the conditions of the call, but it may be a short term thing. Unless both parties fully understand what is really going on, though, and also accept it, it becomes painful and messy.

      On a higher level, yes, we certainly do only love, but that gets forgotten at this level. 🙂


    2. Once the soul call is complete, you will no longer feel the same attraction or pull. Your job may not be to completely heal someone. It may be just to put them on a path or give them something they need. Life is ever evolving so you can’t be 100% no matter what you do. If the pull goes, you can be sure that you’ve done everything you had to do, and you can move on. There is no reason why you can’t tell the other person what is going on, too. It may help them, but trust your feelings if you should or not.


  9. Hi Gary,

    This article is a very insightful. You are definitively a teacher. I have seen cases of Empaths helping other Empaths who are dealing with difficult issues of their own. What you said about the mistaken feeling of the person who sent out the soul call is true. I just want to make an exception to what you said. I feel that their may be a different kind of love between the people involved in answering the person’s soul call. These are are genuine emotions, and exist on a higher level. The person receiving the assistance of an Empath cannot always explain or understand the nature of the feelings and the connection he has with them.


  10. I’ve recently discovered that I am an empath after recovering from depression. There is something that is bothering me though. I had a friend that I just felt a really strong pull towards during the time I was ill-I couldn’t explain it and thought at one point I was in love with him. Later I realised I wasn’t but due to issues around that circumstance, I physically felt unabe to talk to him. Just before I discovered I was an empath, I’d come to the conclusion that he was bad for me and ended the friendship in the most respectful way I could. He said very little but has been watching me (not stalking) and I have felt the pull come again. I feel that by ending the friendship I’d really hurt and abandoned him even although he showed no physical signs of being hurt and I actually suspect that he is a fellow empath, because it would explain some of his behaviour. I feel really bad that I may have totally misjudged him. I really don’t know what to do-can I send a spiritual message without talking to him?


    1. Always trust your feelings, though it’s also important to not let things like guilt influence them, if you know what I mean.

      If he is an Empath, you may want to see if he’s aware of it.

      Some people won’t show they are hurt, even though they may be.

      My question is, what do you want to happen here? Remember, not all people are necessarily good for you, even if you do feel that pull towards them.


      1. I feel I hurt him badly, that he feels misunderstood by people (that is what I felt when we first met) but feels he shouldn’t have to explain himself to me-somehow I should know.
        I don’t know for sure if he is aware of it, although he comes across as being very quiet, stressed at times and once said to me that he is mysterious and unique, so maybe he does know? He also once suggested a song called Gravity (by Embrace) and to me, it made sense that somehow we were bonded someway. Soon afterwards things got complicated when I misunderstood the connection (not without some acts on his part-though not physical but there was a sexual tone).
        I just want him to be okay-not to feel abandoned. I feel like he has been there for a reason, and although I’ve been through hell and back partly because of him, I have gained so much more in the long run.
        Another thing is-I was on the bus the other day and he was there. I sensed his hurt/frustration/anger and I had forgiving thoughts in my head but then I literally ‘blanked’ out afterwards up until the bus had stopped at my stop. I don’t know if this was him rejecting my thoughts?


        1. Yes, it’s certainly possible.

          Are you able to contact him and discuss things with him?

          Maybe all he needs is someone who understands him. You could say you feel it’s a soul call, and talk about what might be important for you both. It doesn’t mean it is anything romantic, though. (I’m sure you know that.)

          Be careful if he appears to be in a poor me / victim mode. Those are draining and rarely lead to anything healthy.


          1. He can be in poor me mode sometimes but I was like that when I first met him though too. Other times he was supportive and a good laugh. More recently conversations (if any) were awkward and he tended to stay away from me but didn’t ignore me if I spoke first.
            I see him nearly every day however, realistically I can’t ‘be friends’ because of the past-not because I hold a grudge or anything, but because I need to put other people in my life first. Because I feel a pull this could be damaging to them. I know it is not a romantic pull but I feel that we are still supposed to be linked.


          2. I should also say thank you Gary-it is good to speak to and get advice from someone who knows what I’m talking about! x


          3. You’re welcome. 🙂 I know such situations are always a challenge. I tend to avoid them nowadays if I’m able to. (Not always successfully I might add!)


  11. Haha, wow. This is an interesting topic. I decided to scroll down your blog really quickly and ‘stop’ at random, because I felt I would end up on the right post. Well I ended up on this one! You’ve just explained to me what I think happened in my younger years…although I didn’t do a very good job of sorting it out.

    ‘At its strongest, a soul call will feel like the helper is falling in love with the caller. They will feel a strong compulsion to see the person, find out their history, know all they can about them, and take every opportunity to be with them.’

    So, I saw a girl a very long time ago – saw her from across a room, and I immediately was put into a state of shock, she had a gigantic dark grey/black cloud of energy surrounding her, but she was all full of smiles for everyone. I became obsessed with this girl, all I could think about for many months was wishing I could help her, because I knew she was suffering more than the 100s of other people around me – suffering a lot more than I was at the time.

    Eventually I managed to talk to her, and found out she had been through some very dark times (probably best not to mention it in depth), but anyway, I at least could feel her immense suffering from across the room. It manifested in me at the time as an uncontrollable infatuation.

    I remember people who found out thought I wanted to have sex with her! But…it was very different to that, I had sensed immense pain and felt desperately that she needed help or I needed to somehow help her. It never ended up very well and I don’t think I helped much but she was shocked I could feel that suffering and did speak to me a bit after that.

    So lately in my life I have been praying more to be of service to unity, and several people have said my messages came at the right time with the right information for them! So all I could feel was pleased that I could be of help – all this happened at an intuitive level, rather than a mental level.

    It is definitely a feeling I’ve had before, to want to heal everything in the world – because the world felt like a part of me, the feeling of ‘how can I be happy if someone around me is sad?’ comes to my mind.


  12. Wow what an interesting read. It has helped me understand so much about myself. As a child my Gran used to tell me I was fae as I had a knowing that couldn’t be explained, I’d dream situations before they happened and my instincts have always been spot on.I have never heard of an empath before but after ticking most of the items on the list I am pretty confident that I am an empath too.
    I’m not quite sure where I go with this knowledge now so will have to research the subject a bit more and find others that are happy to discuss it with me.
    Thank you


    1. Thanks for the comments.

      Generally, Fae tends to be empathic. At least the ones that I have known.

      If you have any questions, please feel free to ask away.


      1. Thanks, I’m sure I have some questions I just don’t know what they are!!! Think I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed that I’m not just ‘odd’ like most people have told me. I’m going to have a very thorough read of your blog to see if that helps clear things up a little for me first 🙂


        1. Believe me, in my circle, you would be considered completely normal. The blog is pretty new still, so I’ve not touched on the dozens of subjects I plan to. Still, once you’re ready, drop me a line and we can discuss things further.


  13. As always so informative and well written Gary. I have answered a few of these. One was especially strong and urgent. It was not understood or supported by the people in my life (nor myself) but it was absolutely something I felt a extreme pull toward. I have never experienced such a strong connection with anybody in my life- nor could I have imagined it possible. I am quite certain there was a past time connection with this man as well. From the moment I saw his picture and heard his words I was impacted deeply… I helped him find a place of unconditional love and acceptance that he had never had. He had a bad alcoholic relapse and couldn’t pull up out of it and I finally had to have him leave for the sake of my own sanity and safety. His path was to die a difficult death through violence in the end. I cannot imagine how traumatic that was for him…it was a terrible shock for me. He shouted out to me a few hours after his body had ceased to have physical life and was obviously scared. I was able to explain to him what had happened to him and tell him what to look for. Through another he came to me a few days later and he was obviously at peace, and radiantly, strongly himself, and expressed that he didn’t understand ‘then’ and thanked me. Honestly, I don’t want another call like that and yet, I don’t know that I could turn away.


  14. How BEAUTIFUL!!! ♥ This information is SO needed in our communities!! I come across amazing empaths almost daily…who had no idea why they feel the way they often feel. THANK YOU for sharing this powerful information with the world!! I honor you…and your path!!


  15. Hi Gary; I’ve been reading your posts for a while and to be honest I’ve found it hard to relate. I guess in a way I see myself on the ’empath’ side, in the ways you describe it, but I’m sceptical as to the labelling. However, I love this post – it completely resonates with me and makes perfect sense of scenarios I’ve experienced myself. I look forward to reading more and trying to be a bit more open minded 🙂


  16. this is fascinating and explains some things i rather wish i’d known years ago. you’re so right, it feels like falling in love but it *isn’t* and that is something i’ve never been able to explain before. thanks for writing about this.


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