Somethings you have to go one step back in order to go two steps forward.

1-forward-2-backThings are going along nicely for a change. You’ve had a revelation. You’ve reached an epiphany and suddenly things are flow and life is good. It can only get better from here on in.

Then suddenly, without warning, you find yourself back at square one. Things feel just as bad, if not worse, and you fall into despair because you were doing so well… and now you’re not.

That anger that you felt you had gotten past before and has allowed you to move on is back in full force and you even feel angrier than before.

Or it might be some trauma, or fear, or resentment, or lack of self-confidence.

Sound familiar?

What happened?

This is a very common scenario, especially for those on the spiritual path. For them it’s 2 steps forward and 1 step back. It’s very frustrating and most don’t really understand what is going on.

So let’s look at what is really happening.

There will indeed be times when we feel like we’re making headway. We are moving forward so fast and feeling so amazing that we feeling that nothing can stop us.

Then we hit that wall. Ouch! Why?

If we’ve faced and conquered our demons, so to speak, then why are they back?

The truth is, you haven’t conquered them fully. You’ve just dealt with one aspect of them. It’s allowed you to reach a new understanding, but there is still more work to do. You may revisit the same thing over and over, each time chipping away at another piece of it until finally you have removed the entire block, and are really ready to move onto new things.

This is normal. It’s not always possible to deal with something in its entirety, especially if it’s deep, long term and part of your belief system.

You have to take it in stages. You have to look at it from different angles, and each stage can feel almost the same, but there are subtle differences.

Or if it is the same, then you’ve not retained what you learned, and you need to have a refresher in what you needed to know.

Life is a process. We can move forwards and backward at the same time, and sometimes you need to move backwards in order go forward.

Remember, if something isn’t there within you to begin with, you wouldn’t be facing it. So you need to deal with it according to your abilities so you can heal it.

Healing can take a long time. There is no time limit to how long it may take. Some feel embarrassed about having the same issues come up over and over again. They may feel like a broken record, but that’s just how it goes. Eventually, if you keep at it, you will heal and get past those things that hold you back.

The problem is that most people get discouraged and give up. They forget how much progress they actually made.

This is the worst thing you can do, though. Giving up will never get you to where you desire to be.

Yes, it can be painful, and yes, you may feel like you’ll never get there, but this I promise you. Keep at it, and you will succeed. Things will shift around for you to make it happen.

Life is a process of creation. You are the creator. Trust in the flow and know that you can’t help but get there in the end, no matter how bad things seem right now.


11 responses to “Somethings you have to go one step back in order to go two steps forward.”

  1. pattidonofrio Avatar

    Just what I needed to read at this point in my life, and there you were 🙂 For me personally, it is too easy to slip into a counter productive depression when that step backwards happens. Thank you Gary, your wise words always have such a positive effect on me. I am beginning to recognize bad energy in the form of some people and having to be strong enough to let them go or somehow block their effect if they happen to be someone I must deal with due to circumstances. Just knowing I am not some loser and not alone in my up and down journey means so much. Thank you again Gary for another wonderful post. ❤


  2. Tanmay Roy Avatar

    Right saying ‘somethings you have to go one step back in order to go two steps forward’. Thumbs up!


  3. Elaine Kurpiel Avatar

    Gary, your article is true and, in my heart, I believe it. All of my life I have been fighting to be myself. A usually lonely fight because I had practically no support. Even now, when I know who I am, it is lonely because when I slip into sadness ( or backward ) as you put it, there is no on one to talk with or to understand. I am continually called upon by others to help them – and I do – but there is no one for me. i try to be strong and continue….but it is very, very hard sometimes. I have tried suicide twice in my past and, though the thought comes to mind, I try not to listen. I appreciate your posts and many of the replies. Thank you.


    1. Gary Leigh Avatar

      It can be certainly a lonely fight. This I know. But I also found that we are never really alone. Just feels that way.

      If you need support, support can be there. (E-mail me if you need.)


      1. Elaine Kurpiel Avatar

        Thank you, Gary.


  4. Wise Old Soul Avatar
    Wise Old Soul

    Indeed. I can vouch all of this to be true and forthcoming. Even though I actively seek a demolition ball instead I the “chip away” technique. 😇


  5. Paranormalogistically Avatar

    But sometimes it feels like you took fifty steps back to go one step forward. It is exhausting and discouraging.


    1. Gary Leigh Avatar

      Yes, it is. That’s when you need to look at what you’re doing, and see if you need to look at something in a different way. (I use Bach Flower Remedies to get past those times… they are a great aid, plus I’m a stubborn bastard.. giving up is not in my vocabulary lol)


      1. Paranormalogistically Avatar

        I am stubborn as well and not one to give up either. But sometimes I think that very stubbornness acts to hold me back….as well as a variety of chronic painful health conditions.


        1. Gary Leigh Avatar

          Don’t know if I can help but feel free to e-mail.


          1. Paranormalogistically Avatar

            Thank you Gary. I will keep it in mind.


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