Do not fear the darkness… thank it instead.

light and darkThere’s a parable by Neale Donald Walsch called The Little Soul and the Sun. There are two parts to this tale. In a nutshell, the story is about a soul who wanted to know who he was., but because all there was, was light, and all he was, was light, he could not do this.
It begins:

There once was a soul who knew itself to be the light. This was a new soul, and so, anxious for experience. “I am the light,” it said. “I am the light.” Yet all the knowing of it and all the saying of it could not substitute for the experience of it. And in the realm from which this soul emerged, there was nothing but the light. Every soul was grand, every soul was magnificent, and every soul shone with the brilliance of God’s awesome light. And so the little soul in question was as a candle in the sun. In the midst of the grandest light — of which it was a part — it could not see itself, nor experience itself as Who and What it Really Is.

And then goes on to explain that in order for the soul to know itself, it must separate itself from all that is and call upon the darkness so it may know its own light and experience who he or she really is.

But in order for that soul aspect to know itself as light, someone had to play the part of being the darkness.

In this story, the soul wished to experience forgiveness, but as there was no one to forgive; someone had to play that part.

Another soul offered: “I will come into your next physical lifetime and do something for you to forgive. I ask only one thing in return,”

“Anything! Anything!” the Little Soul cried.

“In the moment that I strike you and smite you, in the moment that I do the worst to you that you could ever imagine – in that self-same moment…remember Who I Really Am.”

“Oh, I won’t forget!” promised the Little Soul. “I will see you in the perfection with which I hold you now, and I will remember Who You Are, always.”

This story illustrates perfectly why we have darkness. Why there are demons, and why people attack and hurt us.

And while many people do indeed seem to understand that all we do is because we have created it on some level, and that is our free will in action, they seem to forget the very thing they need to remember.

The ones who are dark are dark because without them, we could not experience our own light.

Far too often, I see people condemning demons, so called evil, people who have wronged them and cursing them to Hell (or whatever place they feel is punishing enough. )

Far too often people insist that there is no help for those being and they are not worthy or their time, their healing, or even their love or blessings.

But is this really what we should be doing? So called negative beings don’t remember who they really are. Perhaps they have chosen a part where, by necessity, they cannot have any connection to the light. No matter what is done, they will always be of the dark because that is what is required. And they will remain so until they eventually return, with the rest, to source.

People seem to take great pride in condemning that which they consider to be dark. They simply love to hate and detest anything that doesn’t meet their own personal standards.

But condemning the dark is as useless as condemning the night. Everything is there for a reason. It wouldn’t exist otherwise.

I can’t help but wonder how horrible it would be to be hated by everyone, attacked and detested just for being.

Personally, I feel we should bless the darkness. Thank them for their gift and even their sacrifice. Those who have even experienced a little of what it’s like to not have light in your life should understand what it is like to be like them.

They may not remember who they are. They may never be able to in this realm, but that doesn’t mean we should forget, either.

And while you may not agree or condone their actions, always come from a place of love, rather than hate or fear.

Someone has to play the bad guy. Perhaps one day it may be you.


Psychic attack series: Simple is powerful and it’s simply powerful.

simply powerfulAs mentioned, I’ve dealt with a few people recently that have complained about psychic attacks. It has screwed around with their lives, and effectively even made some consider suicide, just to avoid them.

By the way, this will not help. Energy hooks do not leave us just because we leave the physical body. They continue until those links are removed, which is why for those who can remember past lives, they find the same antagonists coming up time after time.

A psychic attack occurs at your weakest link. So, guilt, fear, anger, hate, and so on can be used to control and influence someone.

Bach Flower Remedies can be a very effective way of stopping attacks.  Mustard, Aspen, Walnut are generally good remedies to use, as well any anything that counters your weak points.

Mantra, prayers and invocations are also said to be useful. The ones I’ve been tend to be rather long winded, though. In the end, you’re more likely to focus on the words rather than the meaning.

If you want a mantra or prayer to be effective, keep it short and sweet. Make sure it you can comprehend it instantly and the words come without effort.

Here are a few suggestions for those who are under attack by either people in their lives or beings they perceive to be in the astral levels.

I am energized.

I take my power back.

I am in harmony.

I am abundance.

You have no power over me.

That last statement I got from the movie Labyrinth. While I can either take or leave that movie, I found those words very powerful.

The important thing with doing anything like this is consistency. In order to manifest the outcome, you need to keep on stating the same thing over and over.

Most people make an affirmation, and then contradict it almost in the next breath.

It’s all too easy to do. Words and thoughts often come unbidden to our mind that do not serve us.

Words such as: I’m so tired of things. What’s the point? I can’t be bothered. Nothing is ever going to change, and so forth.

It’s hard. It’s a challenge to instantly discard any thoughts that don’t fit the outcome you wish to have.

They are hard because that is how you are feeling right at that moment and you feel what you feel.

My suggestion is to acknowledge where you are at, bless it, let it go and use an affirmation that reflects the outcome you wish to see. It’s okay to feel those negative states of being and it’s not until you acknowledge where you are at that you can change where you are going.

One of the things one should be aware of when you start using such affirmations is that things will start to shift. Dramas may start to happen, people may act out of character and you may discover that things are not what they seem.

This can be often confusing, as you may not connect these events to your affirmations. But nothing can change unless the things that are creating your problem are revealed so you can not only deal with them, but take moves to make sure they can no longer affect you.

It may not always be pleasant, though. You may discover things that may make you feel that you wish you didn’t know.

Just remember, fear is our enemy here. Fear of being alone, of lack of resources, of not having a roof over our head.

You may fear that in order to be free and happy, you will have to change everything. And sometimes that is true. But change isn’t always bad. It’s new opportunities and growth.

Sometimes, though, you just need to be ready to move on… and that can take a while.

Remember, though, simple is extremely powerful and that makes you powerful.

Personal experiences: Part 5 – Possessed or Q and A with the Devil.

Statesboro High School

This is a six part story about a paranormal event that occurred in January 1980. As usual, it’s told without any embellishments and according to a document that I had written after the event.

The next morning as I was going down the stairs, I felt that the chain that the cross was on grow hot. It was an odd sensation. It was a definite heat, though I guess I could have been imagining it, too.

Shawn told me that every time he saw the cross, he had the urge to get me to take it off. Indeed, he insisted that I should take it off. Every time I went down the stairs, I felt the chain get heavy, and the urge to take it off come over me. I nearly once did so, but thought better of it.

A bit later on, back up the stairs, I was walking with Shawn towards the doors on the other side of the room when they opened for him. We walked through and they closed behind us. I asked how he did that, as I had felt no wind. He said, he didn’t know. He was just thinking that wouldn’t it be good if the doors opened and they did.

The next day, the temptation to take the cross off was so strong that I actually felt uncomfortable wearing it. The night, Shawn was trying to make me take it off, once again, and I was refusing as usual when he suddenly doubled up in what he said was an agonizing pain. The thought that I should give the cross to him entered my mind. I asked him if he wanted me to give it to him, and he said, yes. I almost did, but decided against it. With that choice, the pain abruptly stopped. I asked him if he would have worn it and he said: No, moods change, and he wouldn’t have given it back either.

Things become quiet after that for a short while. As I wore the cross, I felt protected. The camp went on and was coming to the end. It was only two weeks, but it felt like a very long two weeks.

On the last day, we were all clearing up after ourselves, and I found myself, ironically, being told to sweep the stairs with Shawn. We discussed what had happened, and I asked him about the voice he heard. I was curious about if I could talk to it and asked some questions. Shawn agreed.

The first thing I asked was if Robert Rice died there, and the answer was he didn’t, nor were his ashes upstairs.

I then asked if this was the Devil. The answer was yes. Had he tried to get me before? Yes, he had and was trying to get me now. I asked, why me? It answered that it had failed before and it didn’t like failing and it was trying to possess me. I asked why me and I was told that I was more vulnerable than other people and I expected him to get me. It also said it had posed as my subconscious mind, pretending to be someone who was helpful. I asked if it was after anybody else at the camp, but it said it only me.

I then asked about the pressure we had felt in the stairs. What was it? He said it was trying to frighten us, and it was a stupid thing to have had the séance. I asked what it was trying to do to Shawn when he said the Lords Prayer backwards. The answer was that It was trying to possess him.

I asked if he had succeeded, but he said, no because he hadn’t done it long enough. He also said that he had possessed many people, but they didn’t know it. They just thought they had a bad temper.

I asked if I was interfering with him and if I was a danger to him. He said yes and I was. It told me that the cross gave me some protection, and so did asking for God’s help, but an imaginary cross was not powerful enough and I couldn’t ask for God’s help all the time and I was most vulnerable when I was asleep. It had decided to use the staircase because I had to use it to get to the bathroom. It had taken over Shawn because he was my friend and was using it as a stepping stone to get to me. It also said that it had blown out the lights.

My mistake had been leaving Shawn on the stairway at that time and telling him about my experiences, which left him open to such things.

I asked a few more questions, but all Shawn was now getting was ‘stop it your bastard!’ I stopped and Shawn came ‘back’. He told me that at first he had let me talk to this thing, but after a few questions, he had lost control and it sounded like two people have a conversation. He also couldn’t remember any of what had been said, something I later found out that this was typical of a channel. He also said that sometimes he was reluctant to answer my questions because he felt he was lying.

With what I know now, many of those answers actually make no sense, nor do they ring true.  My feelings are that it was certainly not the Devil, imagined or otherwise. Also, if Shawn felt he was lying, and he didn’t say which questions were lies, then there’s no reason any of it could have been the truth.

I seriously doubt that any of it was true. If Shawn felt it was a lie, then there is no reason to tell me what was really going on, except to tell me what I thought I wanted to hear, and what it wanted me to hear.

This, of course, does beg the question if any channel you get is true.

I know that when I’m writing documents with the aid of my guide, some things flow amazingly well, and I can sense what feels like a connection, or a corridor. Other things don’t however, and I get a sense of anxiety or frustration and I end up erasing what has been written because I’m clearly not either in the space for writing, or the information I need just isn’t available to me as yet.

Sometimes there is also a tendency to write what you think is true, rather than what comes to you, assuming anything comes at all. It’s a trap that’s easy to fall into, and interestingly enough, those are the things that I find out more later on.

In regards to the entity at the camp, I really haven’t gotten any answers I’m happy with yet. I’ve channelled that it was an opportunistic entity who knew who I was, but… that doesn’t feel completely right. I feel I’m still missing something, even 33 years on.

For me, near enough isn’t good enough, but sometimes it’s all I have at the time.

Next: Afterwards


Empath Series – Psychic attacks – You can’t destroy fire with fire or I shall smite thee verily.

Image-1 (1)Many Light-workers consider themselves as spiritual warriors. They see the darkness, they spot the enemy, charge in with their shield and sword, strike it down, and the day is saved.

The enemy is vanquished by taking a stand and defeating the darkness, hopefully for good.

The day is saved and all is well.



In actual fact, attacking what we perceive to be evil, dark, and negative is possibly the worst thing you can do.

In fact, all you are doing is empowering and enabling those things.

It’s like fighting a fire by throwing fuel on it and then wondering why it’s growing stronger, rather than going out.

It is also the very opposite of what a Light-worker actually does and what they stand for.

You cannot change the energy of something by feeding it the same thing it feeds on. You have to introduce something else.

As mentioned, I spent a good part of my life under psychic attacks, and up to the age of 20, I was fighting a daily, but losing battle.

At the time, it didn’t really occur to me that this wasn’t normal. It was just something I just had to put up with in my everyday life.

I’ve faced down a lot of attacks over the years, but this type of attack was different to the ones that came later.

It’s hard to describe what it was like. Best I can do was that it was an overwhelming, clawing sensation in my mind. The pain was more mental and psychic, than physical, but it was there, it was strong, and it was unmistakable. I felt that if I gave in, I would lose myself, or possibly go mad. (It was only many, many years later that I understood what was actually going on there.)

I didn’t tell many people about it, but those I did pretty much told me that it was the devil trying to take my soul, and that I needed to resist and ask God for help.

It was actually pretty useless advice, because it only helped in the moment, and the moment I took my focus away from asking for help, the attacks would return just as strong.

But I had nothing else to go on. There was no information out there, and even those who were supposed to be psychic and knowledgeable were completely clueless.

So for many years, I was determined to beat old Satan, and I would ceaseless fight him, and attack back, while avoiding any references to his name, lest it draw him and give him power.

Needless to say, the battle did not go well.

It was a silent, private, daily battle that I was surely losing. Yet the thought of giving in or even losing was, to me, unthinkable.

Each day, little by little, the attack would become stronger and I knew something would have to give, though I did not know what would happen to me if I gave in.

Then, one day, in 1984, I was at lunch when I suddenly found myself reasoning that I had spent years fighting this thing, with no success, and it appeared that my hate and anger was making it stronger.  If that was the case, then maybe sending it love and peace would help.

So I sent out a message that whatever was attacking me could join me, as long as it was in  in peace and harmony. I also sent it thoughts of love instead of anger.

It was in that instant, the attacks ceased completely. It was as though someone had flicked a switch. They say that what you resist persists, and what you make your own disappears, and this was certainly the case here.

My life changed from that day onwards.

The biggest lesson, which I carry with me to this day, was that the only way to overcome such attacks is to not engage them and be of a higher and loving energy.

Bless them, send them love and light. Give them peaceful thoughts. Be compassionate because those who are attacking know not what they do.

Over the years, I’ve come across many attacks: Some on me and some on others. The ones on me have been more a nuisance factor than any series danger or problem. I’ve always come out of it better and stronger for it. (Though, to be fair, there were some close calls, but the answer was always given to me on how to overcome them, which may not have been the case if I had just attacked back.)

What has amazed me is that nearly every time I come across someone under attack, their method of dealing with it is to attack back, and with as much hatred and force as they can muster. They also tend to pull the ‘victim / poor me’ card, which also doesn’t help anything.

Psychic attacks do happen, and there are a number of ways to counter them, but never, EVER, attack back. Never give the source any more energy to attack you with.

Next: Other methods of protection.

Empath Series – Psychic attacks – Serendipity or cutting the mustard.

BFR MustardAs I’ve mentioned, I’ve spent much of my life under attack. There have been various reasons, which I won’t get into here, but most I have overcome, especially once I’ve tracked the source.

But for whatever reason, I’ve been under pretty strong attacks from 2009 to 2013.

My internet circle has a good deal of psychic people in it, and I’ve a couple who are dedicated to keeping me safe and as it goes, they do an excellent job of it.

However, for the first four months in 2013, the attacks had grown stronger and my exhaustion was to the point where I knew something had to shift if I was going to continue.

Whenever I’m under such attacks, my partner feels it, and she will give me the space to deal with it. Also, the more I am affected, the more of a headache she gets. I’m grateful I have someone in my life that not only understands and accepts me, but knows what to do in order to help and guide me.

As usual, when I’m feeling depression, I take the Bach Flower Remedies, and use the ones that I feel will bring some relief.

They do help, but unless you hit the cause of the feelings, the relief is only temporary.  (which is one the main reasons I say they are not a placebo.)

I’m pretty excellent with the remedies, and I can tell you which remedy does what, but there has always been a couple that eluded me on what they did exactly.  So I never took them.

The problem with the remedies is that while they are amazing, and do work, not everything is known about them, and I believe that many of the discoveries I’ve made in regards to them were made first by me.

Mustard happens to be one of those remedies that I really never understood. Its official use is for deep gloom of unknown origins. However, several remedies also deal with such things. My guide did mention it was to protect against areas of negative energies, but I never looked into it much further than that.

In April 2013, I had finally reached the point where I was fed up with feeling drained, depressed and full of doubt.

I decided to pick up Mimulus (for known fears) when I accidentally picked up Mustard instead. (They are next to each other.)

As I picked it up, I thought: Well why not?

I took two drops directly on my tongue, and felt an immediate lightening of my moods and fatigue. The remedy also tingled like crazy. (The more you need the remedy, the more it will tingle.)

I walked up to my partner and asked her if she sensed any change in me. She said she felt a lightening of her headache.

I took some more and noticed something shift in my body. It was as though some seed or hook was removed (which may have been a hitch-hiker). A minute later, my partner said the headache was gone.

As mentioned, Mustard is said to be the remedy for gloom. I’ve looked it up, but there is not much that elaborates on that.

I feel pretty safe in saying that Mustard is the remedy to stop psychic attacks and coupled with Walnut (the link breaker), it is quite potent.

My exhaustion lifted that night, and has not returned. I’ve felt confident, strong and full of light.

I also feel pretty safe in saying that this is a really important discovery for Empaths as they are very vulnerable to such attacks, especially those who class themselves as Light-workers.

Next: Other ways to protect yourself.

Empath Series – Psychic attacks – Signs of my own attack or I really should consider another gig.

sad facePsychic attacks: Attacks by either people, or entities. Do they really exist?

For those who haven’t actually experienced them, I would not blame you for thinking that I’ve been watching too many horror movies. (I actually don’t enjoy watching them so I don’t.)

But until you’ve been under one, and then identified it as such, and then found a way to block it, it’s hard to even fathom that such a thing can exist, or be real.

Having said that: Like psychic attacks, Empaths are real, and they fall into the same type of category.

Personally, I’ve a very long history in regards to psychic attacks. I’ve had experts try to take me out, and yes, I know how deluded that sounds. (Mind you, those same experts will certainly verify what I just said; especially one I know reads this blog.)

To go into that story would take a book, and it’s not relevant to this particular blog. Suffice to say, I have plenty of experience in regards to such things, and what to do, and how to counter it. I’ve also done some curse breaking, though that is often a tricky business.

The past three years of my life have had their fair share of attacks on me. (Or moments of opportunity, as I prefer to call them, but then no one would know what the heck I was talking about.)

As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve experienced most types of depression, and while I can’t say I enjoyed any of it, it did give me deep insights into the causes, and what I needed to do to heal from it.

People might wonder, though, do I still get depressed?

The answer is, yes, I do, and it is exhausting. Life and being an Empath will do that to you. I also can come out of it just as quickly, especially as I know what I need to do.

However, there was one type of depression I was not having any luck with these past years, and that was a sense of hopelessness, coupled with spiritual and mental exhaustion.

I experienced the following signs: (as detailed in the previous entries.)

  • Things going wrong in clumps.

This means that too many things went wrong, including things that should not go wrong, or were dumped into my lap and made my problem, all at the same time. Too many things that would be against the law of probability. Then suddenly it clears… until the next time.

On a side note, the number triple six always comes up several times in a row just before such events occur. It has been doing that for around 25 years. And no, I am not religious or follow The Bible.

  • Thoughts being whispered into my mind.

These are more like negative feelings, such as: What is the point? Your partner will leave you. You’re not making a difference. And similar wonderful things being sent to my mind. At its worst, (and I’ve had this happen back in 1993), the thoughts try to convince me that everyone would be better off without me, and I should just throw myself under a train. A case is built that sounds reasonable, seductive and a poor me / victim mode kicks in where I sit there stewing and feeling sorry for myself.

Still, I’m a stubborn and tenacious bastard, so I don’t

  • Feeling drained and exhausted all the time.

This is actually the worst one. When my fatigue level gets too high, and I don’t get enough sleep, I will start to go into meltdown mode and even if I do get enough sleep, I can feel a distinct drain on my energy, as though the life and optimism is being sucked right out of me.

That was the one I struggled with on a constant basis for the past three years and it’s also something that many people describe when they are feeling depressed.

  • Interruptions whenever I was working on a project or something that I am doing to help others.

I was reminded of this one because that’s exactly what just happened. Someone will draw my attention away from what I’m doing, thereby delaying or stopping my stream of thought. This particular series seems to have had it come up a number of times now.

  • Seeing darkness or fog around me, or others.

If I stare from my third eye (the area above your eyes), I will sometimes see the room around me dim, or even fade to black.

If I use the same technique on someone who is under attack, their face will literally become hidden behind a black cloud. Until you see such a thing, it’s hard to imagine it. Still, I know I’m not the only one who has observed this.

My ex-partner, back in 2000 saw the exact same thing around her daughter’s face. What was interesting was that I did not mention that I had seen it, too.

Her daughter was under an attack, and cleared it by sending light to the darkness.

I’ve observed this quite a number of times, and every time I send light to that person, they will, without fail, suddenly get up a few minutes later, feeling much chipper and much better.

If the room goes dark, it’s generally because something negative is there.

Recently, while I was at work, I started seeing a white fog before my eyes. That was a new one. It didn’t feel good, though.

  • Sighing a lot and feeling a sense of despondence.

I would get this a lot, especially when I’m working on something like this. It’s a feeling that something does not want me to complete a project. At its worst, I get a sense of hopelessness, and it’s very difficult to fight it.

The thing about psychic attacks are that they attack you are your weakest point. They will home in on your guilt, your doubts, your fears and anything else that you have not resolved.

That is why I call them opportunities, because they reveal what your weaknesses are and allow you to deal with them.

Next: Mustard – the wondrous remedy against attacks.

Empath Series – Psychic attacks. Hitchhikers or I don’t recall inviting you in.

HItchhiking spider

Drawing by Mari

Back in 1999, I was with my then wife and  her 12 year old daughter in our kitchen when I noticed something small and black flash in the air about a foot from my stomach. I only caught a glimpse of it and it was gone. It wasn’t a fly or any kind of flying bug and we had the lights on, so the area was well lit.

Every few minutes or so, I’d catch another glimpse of it and on the third or forth time, I said out loud: What is that?!

My wife said:  What?

But my step daughter said: There’s something black spinning around dad.

She described it as a spider.

I was somewhat surprised that she saw what I saw, and even more surprised how nonchalant she was about it. However, it did validate what I was seeing, and that it wasn’t just a trick of the light, or my imagination.

Still, I had no clue what it was, and the black thing disappeared pretty much afterwards.

I tried to find out what it was, but didn’t get very far. In fact, one lovely chap used it as an excuse to attack me on my spirituality. (Haters gotta hate I guess.)

It wasn’t until 2004 that I discovered more information.  I had met a psychic in a spiritual chat room. She saw me for who I was, and recognized my energies, which was rare back in those days. (As it was, I was being set up for a major attack, but that’s another story, perhaps for another time.)

So I connected with her, and discovered that she was one of the most psychic people I had met to date.

She was able to look at my aura from another country (you might call it remote viewing) and she saw that several large black entities had made their home in my body. They were spider like with long hooked tentacles which wrapped and hooked around my body.

During an evening session over the phone, she worked to remove the parasite by covering it in a sparkly golden aura, lifting it gently and dropping it onto another sparkling golden layer. She made sure she got every part as she said that any part left behind would just grow again. She then asked for her guides to remove the parasite.

This lady also had awakened me to my powers, and I realized that everything I had experienced and done was not just fantasy, but actually real.  So from then on, I used my abilities, and trusted what I saw.

Looking at my own aura, I found that I carried many of these hitch hikers and by going within, I was able to gain a visual to what was there.  I was able to use a spiritual sword to remove these entities. Each time I removed a piece, I felt my body convulse in what can only be described as a kind of sick shock. It was the sensation of metallic apple juice which had gone off leaving my body.

The interesting thing was that after I had removed everything I could, I felt much lighter and people reacted to me in a very different and positive way.

I call these entities hitchhikers. I have not yet quite fathomed what their purpose is though I do know they can and do affect your energies and can cause corruption. I theorize that being such as these may make you more susceptible to astral attacks.

Maybe they are just parasites, and need to feed off energies.

I remember one time; the left side of my stomach was hurting. I looked and saw a large black hitch hiker in the area. I removed it and was amazed to feel the pain dissipate right away.

Another incident that happened was when a friend was complaining of back ache. She was in the USA so I took a look using remote viewing. I saw a large black spider covering the length of her back. I asked her to look without telling her any details and she told me she saw a spider. I removed it and she confirmed she felt the difference without me saying anything to her when I had done it.

She wondered if she had picked it up while she mind travelled through space while she was at work, as she used this method to keep herself from getting bored.

I decided I’d ask the lady who had removed my hitch hikers about it. She knew about the astral spiders and said that they normally got picked up when you mind travel through space.  As I hadn’t mentioned any details, this was a good confirmation. She also told me that these spiders tend to lay astral eggs in their host.

On a final note, I’ve noticed that in the past, people would exorcise bad spirits by making a ‘te te te’ sound.  This sound, when done properly and with the intention of trying to expel something from within, produces the same sensation (and sound) that I described while removing the entities with my spiritual sword. That leads me to conclude that even though it may have been forgotten, that was the original purpose behind that ritual.

Next: Types of psychic attacks.